fuckyeahballpythons:

Well look who’s eating again.

ohhowlucky:

danteogodofsoup:

killbenedictcumberbatch:

standupcomedyblog:

John Mulaney | The Salt & Pepper Diner

THE BEST JOKE IN EXISTENCE

GOD I JUST TOLD SOMEONE ABOUT THIS STORY

This is one of the best pieces of comedy that I have ever had the pleasure of witnessing. I love this. I have been looking for this online for awhile.

arabbara:

R.I.P. The 2976 American people that lost their lives on 9/11 and R.I.P. the 48,644 Afghan and 1,690,903 Iraqi and 35000 Pakistani people that paid the ultimate price for a crime they did not commit

damn-you-banana-man:

gothstoner:

intertnet:

my boyfriend sent me this at 4 in the morning 

im deleting

I’m so upset. I’m sending this to everyone I know.

Tigers in pond.  | Captado 

fartgallery:

chesterloaf:

fartgallery:

i donate blood in the hopes that my blood will overpower theirs and take control of their body so i will gain another vessel to use as my own

why am I reblogging this?

it appears my blood has been successful

jaclcfrost:

u think i am walking around the house with a blanket around my shoulders because i cold but in actuality it is my cloak and i am on an adventure